If you’re not paying attention, you could wake up chained to a bathtub.
You’ve looked for your child everywhere. How the hell did they end up in the safe?
Your house is full of deadly booby-traps.
Right now, somewhere in your child’s room, there is a creepy-ass doll. Tricycle is optional.
At least once a day, your child will come to you and say, “I want to play a game.”
Though you’ll go through trials and tribulations, if you survive, you’ll be a better person for it.
Boo-boos will pop up from time to time. And yes, there will be blood.