Fuck Facebook

All throughout my school years, from elementary to high school, I had to deal with gossip and public shaming. I’d walk by a group of girls and they would snicker and point because EGADS! I’M FAT!!! I’d walk by a group of guys and they’d holler “Tubby!” and “Wankenstein!” (I was once caught pissing behind the gym because the bathrooms were locked, and the guy who caught me told everyone I was jacking off; however, I never did get the Frankenstein reference). I actually thought those days were over.

That’s how Facebook makes me feel. I see other people talking about me, and there’s nothing I can do about it, lest I’m labeled a bully or a BBA or whatever the fuck. I’m not the bad guy because I refused to sit around and watch someone lie about me. This shit happened last year when Spare Ammo and her crew threatened me because I outed Gavin’s Twitter bullshit. Oh, you forgot about that, didn’t you? Spare Ammo’s been liking my posts and commenting and being as friendly as she wants to be, but she threatened me with the BBA Blacklist for exposing the same stuff she she claims to expose everyday. She called my posts self-congratulatory and other nonsense. Now look. She likes my shit! I survived that onslaught, and I’ll survive this shit.

I’m a grown up with a wife and kids and I still have to deal with this shit? Nope. I don’t. Fuck that place, man. It makes me feel like shit and I don’t want to be there anymore. Fuck my author page. Fuck immature children and their opinions. Fuck sociopaths and author spam and vaguebooking and kitten pics (okay, kittens pics are awesome, my bad). But mostly, fuck Facebook overall. That place is a literal detriment to society, where friendships are like playing Jenga with a Parkinson’s patient and the points don’t fucking matter.

This isn’t an attention grab. I don’t give a single fuck if you comment with “Awww, E. you not a wankenstein!” That’s not what this is about. It’s about not feeling fucking worthless based on the goddamn speculation of others. This is not high school. I can choose not to go. I can choose not to participate. And that’s what I’m doing. I’m taking my motherfucking ball and going home. Laugh at someone else, you bunch of stooges.

Mostly this tirade/meltdown/bit of career suicide is about letting people know I’m no longer on Facebook. So yeah, I’m not there anymore. Stop messaging me with what other people are saying about me. I know how cruel and ignorant little kids can be. This is not my first rodeo.

And I cannot stress this enough. I don’t want the pats on the back and the well wishes and the comments about how you know what I’m going through. I only want people to stop asking me why the fuck I left. So here’s your public service announcement.

Now, can I please be left alone?

Now, can I please be left alone?

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