Moreover, having now finished the series, I hate The Order of the Phoenix even more than I did before. There was no fucking reason for that book to be that long and uneventful. No reason. Fucking none. That book can toss my salad with a side of Go Fuck Yourself dressing.
Where was I? Oh yeah…
While I’ve seen the movies, I completely forgot about the significant death scene at the end of this one. I think that’s because I slept through the important parts of the final three films. I had a serious what the fuck moment at the end of this one, thinking to myself, “He can’t die. He’s in the next book.” While I was both wrong and right, I cannot believe I missed him dying in this one. That being said, his death was my favorite part of this book. Not that I didn’t like the character, but because Rowling took a big chance killing him.
Dan 2.0 mentioned that he was interested in how I, being a horror fan, would feel about the cave scene, so this paragraph is for him. I think being a horror fan actually detracted from my enjoyment of that section. Dead people just below the surface of the water goes as far back as Lord of the Rings. It has been used countless times throughout the genre. Most recently, The Woman in Black used this tactic. That’s funny because Daniel Radcliffe is in both film adaptations. Anyway, the cave scene felt dated, but at the same time well written. Of course this goes back to Rowling’s overuse use of the borrow button. But there’s nothing new under the sun, right? Not every book can be The Fold. 😉
To those of you expecting a rage review, my apologies. I think those days are behind us, at least where this series is concerned. Spoiler alert, I actually liked the next book too.
In summation: Everyone told me these books got better, but I did not believe them. Took me longer to get invested than most, but it finally happened. While I still don’t care about these characters nearly enough to fan flail over their deaths and successes, I understand why some do. The lore is rich, even if it is borrowed from every other fantasy book in existence.
Final Judgment: The least suckiest.